I Quit My Job Over Identity Politics But I’m Finding The Beauty In Life Again

Is beauty enough? This is a question I have wrestled with for years, particularly as an art writer, but I really started to wonder about it in the summer of 2022. That summer, I was assigned to review an exhibition of paintings at a local gallery. I went to see the paintings and got to meet the artist who made them. She was a young black artist living and working in Atlanta. I enjoyed my conversation with her, and I admired the work she made. 

Her paintings were snapshots of moments shared with her friends. They were brightly colored and captured what it feels like to be a young woman, bonding with your girl friends and carving out your place in the world. I went back home to write a positive review of the show, and I sent it to the magazine where it would be published. What happened next shocked me. 

I got an email from my editor shortly after submitting the review, informing me that it couldn’t be published. “We think it would be more appropriate for a black person to review this show,” said my white female editor. She went on to criticize the fact that I compared the artist’s use of color to that of my favorite Abstract Expressionist painter, Mark Rothko. “Mark Rothko is a white male modernist,” my editor explained. “You would do better to compare this work to a black female artist.” 

That was when I fully understood that this magazine, which I had contributed to on a regular basis for the previous two years, wasn’t concerned with beauty at all. They weren’t concerned about showcasing talented artists or highlighting new galleries. They were more worried about identity politics. Feeling heartbroken and defeated, I stopped working with that magazine and didn’t publish any of my writing for nearly two years.

A few months before my trouble with the art magazine began, a mystic had given me a soul reading and told me all I needed to do was share my heart and I would find my people. He said, “Share what you love sincerely and your people will feel your heart and find you.” His advice was overshadowed by my falling out with the art magazine, but I never completely forgot his words. 

After a nearly two-year writing hiatus, I finally felt brave enough to start a Substack to talk about the art I love, and now I also talk about wellness there because I love that, too. I share it all on my Instagram, along with snapshots from my life. It’s all the things I find beautiful around my home or on trips with my husband – our cats curled in a chair beside us or the crackling of a fire on a winter’s night, my favorite skincare products or a trip to the beach, an inspirational quote or a recipe I love. 

I haven’t found all my people yet and I have been criticized for refusing to weigh in on the cause of the day, but I have found peace. Yet, I look around me at what other people are sharing, and I can’t say the same for them. They seem angry and disillusioned, upset about this politician or that world event. Our society seems to insist that beauty isn’t enough. Instead, it wants you up in arms and speaking on issues that very few clearly understand.

I log onto social media, and there’s so much noise. Where do you stand on Israel and Palestine? Who are you voting for? Don’t you know x, y, z is just a conspiracy theory? Not only are we meant to be constantly commentating on the news, but we’re also supposed to hold one, mainstream, exclusively left-leaning viewpoint on it. I’m tired of the forced groupthink, and I’m tired of hearing so many opinions. I actually love it when I can’t tell how someone leans politically.

It’s not that I don’t have any opinions myself. I have quite a few, and I doubt many of them would be popular with most of the people in my online or IRL communities. I keep myself informed of current events and seek out news sources that are as free from the typical biases as possible. This is important for anyone to do, especially during an election year, but I don’t give in to the pressure to publicly weigh in on every debate. 

The contribution I can make to society by sharing what I love through my own unique lens is far greater than the impact I would make if I added my small voice to all the online racket. 

I don’t stay silent because my opinions aren’t popular, though. I stay silent because I don’t owe the world every detail of my personal beliefs. The contribution I can make to society by sharing what I love through my own unique lens is far greater than the impact I would make if I added my small voice to all the online racket. They say it’s a privilege to stay silent on world events that don’t affect you; I think it’s a privilege to ignore the beauty of this life and focus exclusively on what’s “wrong.”

If you’re anything like me and you want to build a more beautiful world instead of just commentating on a directionless one, here are some ways you can approach that:

Physical Beauty

I don’t mean how “pretty” you are or how much you make yourself look like the latest it girl. I mean how you care for yourself and your body. Do you make time for exercise that feels like self-care instead of punishment? Do you give your body rest when it needs it and feed it nourishing foods? These are the kinds of things that enhance your physical beauty and also help you have the space to care for those around you. When you are strong, healthy, and rested, you can show up big for others.  

Emotional Beauty

Emotional beauty has to do with what you’re like on the inside. Are you confident and calm within? Are you kind to yourself and others? Do you pause to consider how others feel when they are around you? Is your presence supportive, loving, and thoughtful? Of course, it’s necessary to set boundaries and use good judgment, but when you practice emotional regulation, you can, again, be a more valuable member of your community. Good ways to emotionally regulate include physical self-care and mindfulness practices like meditation or prayer.

Spiritual Beauty

It’s not easy to keep yourself healthy and happy without a connection to something greater than yourself. We all need a purpose and a sense that what we’re doing each day matters. Practice your faith or cultivate connection to something greater than yourself through meditation or prayer on a daily basis. Seeing a bigger picture, trusting in a grander plan, and honoring the mystery of life will help you more gracefully navigate challenges and be a better friend to others.

Aesthetic Beauty

Aesthetic beauty, meaning the way things look, often gets brushed aside as vain or vapid, but it can be just as meaningful as any other kind. You can use aesthetics to create a personal style that makes you feel confident and feminine. I know you know how the right outfit can make or break your next interview or date. You can also use aesthetics to beautify spaces like your home or workspace. Placing a vase of flowers on your desk might calm your nerves, the same way tidying your room could help you focus better. Again, it’s less about copying popular styles or going on a shopping spree and more about finding ways to incorporate the style that makes you feel and operate like your best self.

So what’s the point of all this talk of beauty? Well, I think it’s clear that beauty isn’t beside the point. It is the point. It makes life worth living, and it makes you a better person. Beauty also begets more beauty, meaning that when we live beautiful lives, we radiate beauty to others and inspire and create space for them to do the same. So, instead of screaming on the internet about things you can’t control, why don’t you get busy beautifying your own corner of the world, inside and out? Can you imagine what the world would be like if more people decided to do that?