Good Things Take Time: The Feminine Art Of Slowing Down And Making Beautiful Things
A garden spilling over with blooms, a wedding gown adorned with the finest lace, a well-appointed house that hums with life – all of these things came to be, slowly and sweetly, over time.
Why is it that the loveliest, most beautiful things take time? It may be because of the graces that patience brings. It may be because of all of the acts of love, compounded over the hours and days. It may be because we, the most beautiful of all things on earth, take time, and all other good things are an echo of the beauty of the human soul. Whatever it is, women know best how to slow down and patiently create the things that make life so wonderful.
Woman vs. the World
The world tries to teach the false narrative that success and happiness are found in the hustle, in the ceaseless racing toward the next thing. Women know otherwise. Women know that life is splayed out before us in the now, that joy cannot be grasped unless we slow down to place a gentle hand upon it, and that the greatest successes are borne of patient endurance and devoted consideration. This ability to slow down, anticipate needs, and intentionally and lovingly create is an art form that is intrinsic to females. It’s evident in our very physiology.
We Were Made for This
Women were made with the ability to carry, grow, and nurture new life. This process isn’t a swift one. For nine months, a mother’s body sustains and builds and protects the life within her. All of it happens little by little – almost imperceptibly. In this time, the mother nourishes her child through her own careful actions and choices, nests and makes her house ready for the arrival of her little one, and prepares her heart for the increase in love that will be required of it. Our physical self reflects our interior self, so this biological faculty reflects our propensity for gently and diligently cultivating in all other aspects of life.
By seeing the big picture of life, we can dream and plan and do things that take time with care and excellence. A woman can plan a lavish surprise party for her husband, make delicious sourdough baked goods, and remodel spaces within her home. She can plant a garden that will eventually blossom and bear much fruit, put together a family photo album, or choreograph a ballet. She can envision and then devote herself wholly to the task at hand, working steadily until the dream comes to life.
We are able to love others so well when we practice this art of slowing down and planning ahead. The acts that we perform and the things that we create are quality and infused with our love and attention. A homemade meal speaks “I love you” to your family in a way that boxed macaroni does not (not to knock boxed mac – it has its place). A handwritten letter tells another that you’re thinking of them in a way that a text does not. A house that is, by degrees, fixed up and transformed into a home is far more welcoming than a house that’s quickly constructed and decorated in a day with Ikea and Target.
Too often, we’re told to take the shortcut or choose the more convenient option. We’re told that there are better things to be doing than loving and creating. We’re told that we can be hustling and earning. But that isn’t what women are built for; we’re built for slowing things down, beautifying the world, and safeguarding what is most precious in life – the things that do take time.
Cultivating the Gift
How can we cultivate this feminine gift in a world that’s so averse to it? We must first make ourselves less busy. By clearing our schedules, we free up time to do the things that are worth doing and in a manner we want to do them. We should, more and more, say “no” to convenience products and services, recognizing that efficiency is not always better. In choosing the less “practical” way, we often choose the finer way. We can learn to be more patient and realize that instant gratification isn't better than the joys of a job well done. Though waiting seems hard, we may just find that life’s felicity is often found in the waiting.
If you want to “practice” this art, learn a new skill that takes longer than a few hours or days. Maybe you’ve always wanted to learn to sew your own clothes or play the cello. Maybe you want to learn flower arranging so you can beautify your home or make your friend’s wedding bouquet. Maybe you want to be able to bake and decorate gorgeous cakes so you can stop buying overpriced grocery store cakes for your kids’ birthdays. Maybe you simply want to learn how to fix your hair in more elaborate ways or make really good cappuccinos like an Italian barista. Start small and tap into this gift. Soon, you’ll find that you have the desire to do more in a way that requires thoughtful planning, time and patience, and lots of feminine energy and love.
Closing Thoughts
When we, as women, slow down and work to allow beauty to slowly blossom and mature in our lives, we better love those around us. Slowing down also enables us to become, in the way that a block of marble becomes a masterpiece. As we slow and create, we are transformed, little by little, into our most feminine selves, unlocking the genius within us.
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