Dirty Talk: A Wife’s Guide To The Most Erotic Love Language

My husband and I are sitting at a cozy table in our favorite Italian restaurant. The flickering candlelight dances across our wine glasses as we speak in low tones across the table. We’ve made a game of it on our date nights – a game that starts with innocent, loving phrases and escalates into the dirtiest talk our creativity can muster. Our voices are hushed just enough to avoid drawing too much attention, but loud enough to hear each other clearly. The thrill of the game lies in the naughtiness of our surroundings, knowing that the other diners might catch a scandalous word or two if they’re paying close attention. 

*18+ Disclaimer: This article contains explicit adult content and is intended for educational purposes for married women only. Reader discretion is advised.

The Risqué Relay Restaurant Game

This game was inspired by a scene from 500 Days of Summer, where the characters shout "penis!" louder and louder in a park, which was funny but also a bit ridiculous. We decided to put a sexier, classier twist on it, though our version ends up being far more vulgar.

"You look iconically beautiful," he starts, his eyes locking onto mine with a mischievous glint. I smile, feeling a warm flush spread across my cheeks. "I love how light I feel when you pick me up in your arms," I reply, my voice soft and sincere. The phrases become bolder, more charged with each turn. "I can't wait to kiss your lips and feel your breasts swell.” My heart races as I look around at the unaware patrons. I respond with, "I want to feel your hands gripping my bare ass as you pull off my thong." We continue, pushing the boundaries with every exchange. His eyes are laser focused on me, a stern and confident posture. I feel him undressing me with his gaze. 

"I’m going to make you cum so many times you’ll be trembling and unable to speak," he says. Nice. But I pull out the big guns. As the waiter approaches with the check, I lean forward one last time, my low-cut dress pulling his eyes downward to my cleavage pressed between my arms. "Hey, babe?” He looks back up into my eyes. “I think I’m gonna suck your cock under this table," I say matter-of-factly, followed by a smile as I pull back. The waiter places the check on the table, and I think he might have heard me. My husband takes the check and thanks him. I almost choke on my wine when the waiter responds, “Enjoy your dessert.” 

Dirty talk isn't just about sex.

This game – this playful, erotic exchange – has become one of our favorite forms of foreplay. Words have incredible power and meaning. They can arouse, excite, and create a sense of closeness that is both thrilling and deeply intimate. Dirty talk isn't just about sex; it's about the emotional connection it fosters, the anticipation it builds, and the way it keeps the fire burning throughout the day and night. 

Understanding Your Type: Personalized Dirty Talk

Before we dive into the art of talking dirty, it’s important to recognize that every wife is different. Your approach to dirty talk should reflect your personality, comfort level, and the dynamics of your marriage. Here’s how you can tailor your dirty talk to fit your unique style.

The Shy Romantic

You’re soft-spoken, gentle, and prefer the term "making love" over anything too graphic. You value emotional intimacy and want to express your love in a way that feels genuine and heartfelt. Your dirty talk should be tender, but with just enough heat to keep things spicy.

Examples:

• "I can't wait to feel you close to me tonight."

• "You make my heart race every time you look at me."

• "Your kisses make me melt."

The Sensual Romantic

You are deeply sensual, valuing both emotional intimacy and physical connection. You enjoy the buildup and the emotional connection, and you prefer a mix of subtle and bold expressions of desire.

Examples:

• "Your touch drives me wild."

• "I crave your lips on my skin."

• "I feel so loved when you thrust inside me."

The Adventurous Romantic

You're outgoing, confident, and love to push the boundaries. You’re not afraid to use graphic language and enjoy exploring new and exciting ways to keep things hot and steamy.

Examples:

• "I want you to take me right here, right now."

• "I want you do me someplace where people might hear, and I’ll do my best to keep quiet."

• "I love it when you get rough. Rip my clothes off, I don’t care.”

The Naughty Romantic

You're confident, bold, and uninhibited. You love using explicit language and thrive on the raw, primal connection it creates. Your dirty talk is all about expressing your deepest desires without holding back.

Examples:

• "I’ve been naughty. I want you to spank my ass."

• "F*ck me harder, I love it when you’re rough."

• "I want you to f*ck me until I scream."

Building Confidence: Key Tips for Talking Dirty

Now that you've discovered the style of dirty talk that feels most natural to you, the next step is learning how to deliver it with confidence. Whether you're a seasoned seductress or just finding your voice, these tips will help you express your desires with authenticity and ease.

1. Know Your Husband's Style. Before diving into dirty talk, understand your husband's preferences. Open communication about what turns each of you on can help ensure that the experience is enjoyable for both.

2. Start Slow. If you’re new to dirty talk, begin with subtle, flirty comments. Gradually increase the intensity as you become more comfortable and gauge your husband's reactions.

3. Be Authentic. Use phrases and words that feel natural to you. Authenticity is key to making dirty talk sound genuine and sexy rather than forced or awkward. Don’t be afraid to explore beyond your comfort zone. If you’re known to be classy, some explicit words can be a sexy surprise for your husband.

4. Use Your Voice. Experiment with different tones and volumes. A whisper can be incredibly seductive, while a firm, confident tone can convey dominance and desire.

5. Describe What You’re Feeling. Verbalize your physical sensations and emotions. Phrases like "You feel so good" or "I love how you touch me" can be incredibly arousing.

6. Mix It Up. Combine sweet and romantic phrases with more explicit and bold ones. This variety keeps the conversation dynamic and exciting. If you never get explicit, you may fail to turn him on with just your words. But if you repeat the most graphic words over and over, they’ll lose their effect. As Violet Crawley in Downtown Abbey said, “Vulgarity is no substitute for wit.”

The Full Spectrum: From Classy to Vulgar

As you build your confidence, remember that dirty talk is a versatile tool. It can range from subtle and sweet to bold and downright filthy. The key is to find your comfort zone and play with that balance. Here’s a streamlined list to inspire you:

Classy and Subtle

• "You’re so handsome, you make me weak."

• "Being with you is my favorite fantasy."

• "You make my heart pound."

Sensual and Suggestive

• "I love you so much, I’ve been thinking about your hands on me all day."

• "The way you kiss me drives me wild."

• "I crave the taste of you so much it hurts."

Bold and Explicit

• "I need all of you inside me right now."

• "You make me so wet, I can’t take it."

• "I want you to take me hard and fast."

Extremely Vulgar

• "I want to f*ck your brains out until we wake the neighbors."

• "My pussy is so wet, I’m aching for you to cum inside me."

Real-Life Scenarios

Understanding the spectrum of dirty talk is just the beginning. To help you see how these words can come to life, I’m going to share some of my favorite recent memories that were made delightfully erotic by dirty talk. As you will probably tell, my style is somewhere between an adventurous and naughty romantic. My style was originally more of a sensual romantic, but I evolved over time based on what really gets my husband going.

Driving in the Car

We were driving home from a dinner date, the city lights flickering through the windows. I wanted to feel the excitement of a little danger without posing a genuine risk to our safety. I leaned back in my seat and looked over at my husband, my fingers playing with the low neckline of my dress. “Are you hard?” I asked as he looked over with a smirk. I looked straight ahead and followed it up with, “You’re so sexy when you drive. I wish you were in my mouth… But I don’t want to make you crash.” I knew what he’d say next. “You don’t think I can keep us on the road?” I shook my head gently. “Not this time.” He started accelerating but soon came to a halt behind traffic. We had a good 20 minutes to go. “If you pull over, I’ll blow you ‘til you cum,” I said sweetly, “and don’t worry about the mess… I’ll swallow it all.” He floored it for the next exit.

Eating Dinner at a Restaurant 

We were out for a birthday dinner with friends. Someone was talking my husband’s ear off, a guy he’s always found to be obnoxious. I wanted to ease his misery and tease him at the same time. I leaned over and whispered close to his ear, “I’m not wearing any panties. What are you gonna do about it?” Then I went back to sipping my cocktail as I gently placed my free hand high on his thigh. 

At a Family Gathering

It was a family barbeque for Labor Day, and my husband was chatting with my grandmother, who is one classy dame. I walked up to them both and put my arm around him. She commented on how she loved the little diamond hanging from my neck. “Aw, thank you, Mimi! He’s very generous, he’s always buying me beautiful things. Last week, he gave me a pearl necklace that was just to die for.” My husband tried his best to hide his shock, while my sweet Mimi, blissfully unaware of my sexual innuendo, commented, “How lovely. Apparently, pearls are old-fashioned, but every lady should wear pearls, and often!” I smiled innocently, “Oh, I agree. Would you excuse us for just a moment?” I pulled him a few feet away and stretched up on my tippy toes to whisper, “If you’d like to give me a pearl necklace, I’ll be on my knees in the upstairs bathroom.” 

At the Movies 

We were sitting in the dark as the projector light streamed overhead for a special night of throwback cinema. Without taking my eyes off the screen, I took his hand and slowly guided it up my skirt to my thigh, but no further. My husband leaned over and whispered in my ear, “Are you bored?” “No,” I responded. “Just really horny. I’ve always wanted to be fingered at the movies.” I grinned without making eye contact. We were far back enough to where we might get away with it. “You’re not allowed to moan or make a sound if I do this,” he said softly. I took a breath and whispered, “I accept.”

In an Elevator 

We had just left a work-related gathering in Manhattan and had 34 floors to go to the lobby. My husband pulled out his phone to check his email. I said, “So, are you gonna kiss me against the wall or make me beg?” He smiled, put his phone away, and kissed me deeply against the glass. “I wish this elevator was slower so you could pull up my dress and take me now.” His hand was on my bum just as the ding of the elevator doors snapped us back to reality. “Oh well,” I said coyly, as I stepped into the lobby. 

At the Beach 

He was reading. I was lying, face down, in a cover-up. I slipped out of my cover-up and laid back down in a cute bikini from Frankie’s. As I unclipped my top to avoid tan lines, his eyes peeked over the top of his book. “Baby,” I asked, “could you put some tanning oil on me?” He eagerly got the oil from the beach bag and started applying it to my back. As his hands drifted lower, I raised my hips a bit. “Does this thong make my ass look good?” I asked nonchalantly, knowing it did. “Insane,” he said, his hands rubbing my cheeks in oil, drifting a little too close to the center. I lightly swatted his hand away. “Easy, handsome. We don’t want to cause a scene.” This kind of flirting is fun because he can’t act on it right away. “You can give me a foot massage instead,” I said with a smile. “You should sit down, though.” As he did, I put my feet on his lap and rubbed his growing erection through his trunks with my foot. “Otherwise, people will notice your bulge.” I like teasing, but I’m not cruel. So I made sure to mention, “Since you like this bikini so much, I’ll wear it when I f*ck your brains out later.” A good wife always keeps her promises.

Final Thoughts: Embrace A Sultry Tongue

Dirty talk can be a powerful tool in your marital toolbox, enhancing intimacy and keeping the spark alive. Remember, the key is to be authentic and confident, and remember to mix things up. Sometimes, I just want to be held close and hear my husband whisper that I’m his everything. Other times, I crave the wild side and want him to f*ck me so hard that I’m sore when I walk the next day. Dirty talk is like that. It shouldn’t always be the same, and it doesn’t always have to lead to sex. Whether you’re whispering sweet nothings or shouting passionate declarations, the most important thing is that you and your husband find it erotic. So, embrace your inner vixen and have fun with your tongue!