Alex Cooper Isn't Actually A Hypocrite

The critics piled on within hours and the accusations of hypocrisy were immediate. People wondered how she could possibly live with herself; after all, she constantly praises hookup culture and casual sex on her podcast, and yet here she is, happily married with a baby on the way.

To believe that Alex is a hypocrite is to misunderstand the ways of modern feminism, though. It may seem like she's talking about a lifestyle on Call Her Daddy that she doesn't actually believe in, let alone walk herself, but that's not quite what's happening here. Alex Cooper is actually living out the perfect feminist dream. The only problem is, that dream is not nearly as attainable for everyday women as they would like to believe.

Alex Cooper's Path to Marriage

Alex has built a public brand around candid conversations about dating, relationships, and modern romance, but much of her own love life remained intentionally private for years. Before becoming engaged and eventually marrying film producer Matt Kaplan, Cooper often discussed past relationships anonymously on her wildly successful podcast, Call Her Daddy, using nicknames rather than revealing identities. In the meantime, she would also talk about graphic sex experiences with her guests and even encourage her listeners to sleep around as much as they choose.

One viral clip in particular features Alex instructing her audience to find a summer fling—a man who is unemployed, has friends that you don't even like, and has no intention of taking you on a dinner date. She gleefully recommended having wild sex with a guy you don't even particularly like, because summer is all about zero commitments and no worry about the future.

She has also ridiculed men who express any kind of negative reaction to a woman with a long, chaotic history of dating and sleeping around, claiming that it's fun and normal for women to have a high body count. And she's repeatedly doubled down on the idea that these women should have absolutely no shame for being promiscuous.

Early in the rise of Call Her Daddy, fans frequently speculated about the real identities behind Alex's stories involving athletes, ex-boyfriends, and complicated situationships she referenced on the show. During the podcast's explosive growth between 2018 and 2020, Alex often portrayed herself as single and navigating modern dating culture while balancing sudden fame and business success.

One of her most discussed rumored relationships involved former professional baseball player Noah Syndergaard, though Alex never fully centered the relationship publicly. She also alluded to other relationships with athletes and entertainment figures during various podcast episodes, helping fuel internet speculation around her dating history.

However, Cooper's approach to privacy shifted significantly when she began dating Matt. The couple reportedly met through mutual connections in the entertainment industry around 2020. Unlike her previous highly publicized dating stories, Cooper kept the relationship largely out of the spotlight in its early stages. On her podcast she referred to Matt only by the nickname "Mr. Sexy Zoom Man," a reference to how their relationship began during the COVID-19 pandemic through virtual meetings and long-distance communication.

As their relationship became more serious, Cooper gradually opened up about the stability and emotional maturity she found with Matt. She frequently contrasted the relationship with some of her earlier dating experiences, describing it as healthier, calmer, and more grounded. In 2023, Cooper announced her engagement to Matt, sharing details about the proposal and describing the relationship as deeply supportive both personally and professionally. The couple later married in an intimate ceremony. Now, they're expecting their first child together.

This Is the Modern Feminism Blueprint

Modern feminism does not have objective standards or rules to follow because the entire ideology is built upon the premise that women should never have to follow any standards or rules. If you want to sleep around in your 20s and 30s, do it. If you want to sleep around in your 20s and then get married in your 30s, do it—but only if it's on your own terms. If you want to never have kids, don't have them. If you want to freeze your eggs so you can have kids in your late 30s, do it—but only if it's on your own terms.

It's not that modern feminists think women should never get married or have kids, it's that they believe there should be no protocols that women feel pressured to follow, and that there should be no consequences for their choices and actions, especially the choices and actions of their younger years. That's why women are encouraged to sleep around when they're young and hot. Date around, have casual sex, sleep with the loser who has no prospects but smells good, get dumped, dump men, have summer flings, get as many abortions as you want. Never believe the lie that there are rules to follow, because you are the arbiter of your future and you should never accept a friend or a boyfriend who would judge you for your past.

The entire ideology is built upon the premise that women should never have to follow any standards or rules.

However, if there comes a time that you do desire marriage and motherhood, there's nothing wrong with that. You can retire your hoe phase, consequence free, and start to look for your perfect forever man. And this high-value man of your dreams (rich, tall, handsome, sexy) will not and should not care what your past looks like.

But there are a few flaws with this plan. Everyday women who consume Call Her Daddy simply aren't on the same playing field as someone like Alex Cooper. This modern feminist blueprint sounds utopian (because in many ways, it is), and in reality it only works for exceptionally successful, gorgeous, alluring women with influence. Think models, actresses, wealthy entrepreneurs and heiresses. Of course there are exceptions, but we're talking about the rule. This blueprint doesn't quite translate for the average woman working a boring 9-5 job. By the time she's well into her 30s and has gotten sick of the casual dating scene, she doesn't have the same allure and magnetism as a famous rich blonde who regularly rubs shoulders with elite celebrities. The men that she wants to try and settle down with—the "high value" men—are much more likely to settle down with or marry a woman much younger, much less seasoned, and much more fertile. This sounds harsh, but unfortunately it's the general way of the dating world, and it's one of the (albeit not the only) reasons that we are seeing such a high rate of women in their mid to late 30s who are dating for marriage but having trouble finding a husband. The dating pool has shrunk significantly, leaving them with far fewer options (unless they adjust their standards).

Put simply, women like Alex Cooper can proudly carry around a "hoe phase" with far fewer consequences because the men in her dating pool are more likely to overlook it or not care about it because of the influence and status she brings to the table. This is not an endorsement for extraordinarily beautiful women to have endless casual sex, but rather a mere acknowledgement of the ways of the dating world. It's not fair. But that's how the cards usually fall.

This modern feminist blueprint sounds utopian (because in many ways, it is), and in reality it only works for exceptionally successful, gorgeous, alluring women with influence.

The lack of objective standards in the world of modern feminism is the primary reason that this ideology turns out to be such a massive failure for so many women. We want to believe that rules and standards are limiting, but the truth is, there is freedom to be found from functioning within an objective type of morality. We should be teaching young women that it's good to preserve their sexuality. It's moral to respect your body. It's worthy to only give yourself to a man who is fully committed to you.

And even if you don't see anything morally wrong with the hookup culture that Alex praises on her show, women would be wise to understand the real world, and that you have a much greater chance at locking down a high-value man when you're a bit more austere, particularly in your younger years. This is by no means supposed to make women with a regrettable past feel like they are doomed in the future; it's meant to flip the cultural script and offer a new narrative for the younger generation of women. Just because the celebrities sleep around with no consequences doesn't mean that others should follow suit.